Friday night I was having a conversation with a friend. My friend is going on a date Saturday with an old ex. They’ve been talking and things are going pretty good. My friend was understandably nervous.
My last words before we said good night were:
“You have a good evening too.
And tomorrow?
Just relax and enjoy yourself.
You do not need to make any life-altering decisions tomorrow ~ just enjoy 😊”
My friend was a bit relieved. Afterwards, while listening to live jazz at my favorite neighborhood coffee shop, I thought about our conversation.
At the time I was just trying to help my friend relax. But I started thinking about my parting words. I am a writer, but what I said was not prepared. I was happy for a friend and want the date to go well.
The more I thought about what I said, the more I thought about when I actually follow that advice, and when I need to.
My ex-wife and I have an amicable relationship now. She’s remarried to a good man. And with 1,500 miles between us we rarely argue. She is now doing very well at keeping me updated about our daughter, photos and conversations about important decisions concerning our daughter.
About once or twice a month I see an ex for coffee or drinks. Not a date. Just a friendly get-together to catch up on things. A chance for me to have conversation with an intelligent atteactive woman, with no pressure.
Thursday I had a second interview with a potential employer (yes, I am changing jobs).
So what do all these things have in common?
“Just relax stupid, and enjoy yourself.
You do not need to make any life-altering decisions tomorrow ~ just enjoy.”
Yet, often in life we become nervous about things when what we need to do is take a deep breathe, relax, and enjoy the moment.
So, as you start your new week, don’t forget to relax and enjoy yourself. You really do not have to make any life-altering decisions tomorrow.
Have a blessed week!
joeccombs2nd 
https://polldaddy.com/js/rating/rating.jsPlease,
Explain how an EX is a good source of intelligent conversation. To me, going for drinks or coffee is counterproductive. We ALL have Ex’s… Most the time, they are to be just THAT, an EX.. If they were meant to be any part of your life, they would not be an EX.. ISN’T that looking Backwards??? Now, Unless there are children involved, that’s entirely different.. Just going fir Coffee or Drinks is awkward for everyone. Plus, takes away from continuing on with your own life. SO, kindly explain.. It makes no sense to Me..
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Your questions are outside the scope of the article. However, since you ask, there times in life where people start out in the wrong role in your life.
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I very recently had an ex-fiance take me to a doctor visit after my burn issue (see post today). She is now happily married and I am very happy for her. We talked and spent a pleasant time together (excepting my office visit). It was nice and I was happy we stayed friends.
You are right.
Scott
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This is excellent, but there are a few typos, which you will catch when you proofread it again. Love, Sis
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Are you going to mention the TITANIC again? That subject seems to be far from dead yet as last year the coal bunker fire was relit again! Why was the ship given a seaworthy certificate twice with a coal bunker on fire when leafing Belfast for Southampton where the second seaworthy certificate was given? White Star Line certainty knew about too! For such a prestige brand new ship unforgivable.
Mike.
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It was given a seaworthy certificate because the ship was seaworthy. On coal fired steamships coal bunker fires were a common occurence, something that every ship that stayed in service for its entire projected service life would experience. Most ships would have several over their service life.
This fire was not visible flames. It was hot embers like the red hot coals in your barbeque. Heat and smoke, but no flames. These kinds of fires cannot be put out onboard ship with water. The standard procedure for putting out a coal bunker fire was to load the coal from the bunker into the boilers as soon as possible. Then after the bunker is emptied it would be inspected and then redistribute coal from other bunkers into that bunker to ensure the weight of the ship’s coal was evenly distributed among all the bunkers. When you look at an event like this you can’t just take our knowledge from the 21st century and apply it directly to an event over 100 years ago. You have to first ensure the terms used then mean the exact thing they do now. Then you have to judge based on the knowledge that was known then not now.
And in the future I would appreciate it if you would make your comments on the particular article of which you are commenting about. If there is no article on your specific topic then make your comments on our “About Us” page.
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https://polldaddy.com/js/rating/rating.jsHi Joe,
I agree with you that coal bunkers fires were common on ships of the past. O though when the fireman in the British enquiries were asked have they ever see a coal bunker fire before? The answer was NO. This is a typical case of what financial pressure can do and still on going to day. White Star are under pressure to launch the ship. When look into what has been changed from Olympic to Titanic there is quite a lot and expensive too. The Olympic when launch was the world’s biggest and most luxury ship afloat but rather rushed through clearly the ventilation was inadequate and were costly to change. As you have covered some of them in your book but there were many more as in TITANIC or OLYMPIC Which ship sank? Book.
Not only that the start of 5th crossing a serious accident with the British war ship HMS Hawke was huge lost loss to White Star Yes you are right to say the ship was seaworthy. But the real issue how can a Government inspector give that certificate knowing there is a coal bunker fire is in progress? As question in the British enquires Maurice Clark was not aware of the coal bunker fire and if know he wouldn’t given the sea worthy certificate. White Star new that to and to empty the coal bunker is not a five minutes as prove it took a minimum of 13 days. White Star could not afford any further delays as the ship is all ready months behind schedule and spent over on budget. Until you have paying passengers you cannot recover your investment. Spare a thought to remove the coal whist in dock where do you put it? After days removing the coal and extinguished the coal bunker has to be refilled now. It’s all to done with financial bearing down on them. White Star is a profitable company but not can be said for IMMC which is huge loss making origination no thanks to Mr JP Morgan on how he set the company up. Morgan is desperate for profits and this is the last thing he wants to hear about. I afraid it’s still going to today when companies get into financial trouble they will do desperate things to get out of it.
Mike.
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