I have touched on parts of this (what we are about to talk about) before. But, with the holiday season upon us I think now is a good time to go back to this again.
As I’ve said before I forgive people, not for them, but for my own peace of mind. Yes, even people who are not sorry. This is not an outward act. This is not something you do publicly. An outward forgiveness will not bring you peace. This is a very personal and silent act you do. It is not important for someone to know you have forgiven them (though if they do apologize it is important to tell them you forgive them). It is important for you to forgive them in your own heart.
When you forgive someone in your own heart it lets all of the hurt feelings and bitterness leave you, making room for joy, peace, and happiness to take its place.
We only have a short time to be here. So, you really do not have time to waste on hurt and bitterness. Life can be so much fun. Even the simplest things in life can make you so very happy if your mind and heart do not have bitterness and pain within them.
It is not easy to forgive some people, I know. But there is one person in your life that you really need to forgive above all others. When you can finally forgive that one person, then forgiving the other people you should forgive will be easy, making room for happiness to be your companion.
I do not know who that one person is for you. For each one of us that one person is someone different. For me the first person I needed to forgive was my father. When I forgave him I literally felt as though a large weight had been lifted from me, and then forgiving others was easy.
Something else we should touch on, everyone comes into your life for a reason. I firmly believe that. Not just someone like them, but those specific people who have at one time or another been a part of your life or crossed your path. There are other people who could have met that specific purpose, but life is a two-way street. Not only was there a specific reason each person has come into your life (and sometimes left it), but there is a specific person why you are or were part of their life as well.
By forgiving people you are allowing yourself to be blessed by their presence in your life. You are also making it possible for that person to be blessed by your presence in their life. This does not mean that you will be back in each other’s lives again. It does mean that the path will be cleared for the both of you to benefit from the blessing you were both intended enjoy from each other. And those blessings that you were intended to be for each other may not be the same. But you were meant to cross each other’s path.
I know it is difficult sometimes to forgive people. And I have something that should help you get started. Christmas cards. No this is not a sales ad for Hallmark. Each year I send Christmas cards to people. I enjoy sending Christmas, I send lots of Christmas cards. I think that you should send Christmas cards this year too as a way of helping you to get closer to forgiving people.
If you do not already send Christmas cards, buy one box of Christmas cards to send out this year, and Christmas stamps for the envelopes too. Send most of the cards to family, friends, neighbors, and co-workers. You do not have to send EVERYONE a card. You can also give cards to people you come in contact with on a regular basis but do not fit one of those categories (your mail handler, people who work at places you frequent, people who pick up your trash and etc.).
Save a couple of those cards for people you need to forgive. Sign the card (no notes or other written words from you), address the envelope, put the card(s) in with the other cards you are mailing and mail them all together.
If you already send out Christmas cards – great! Just add the name of someone you need to forgive to your Christmas card list.
Do not write them a note or add a few words to the card. You are not trying to get that other person to do anything. They may not even read your card. That is ok. It is not about the other person. It is about you for giving them so you can make room for happiness in your life. Sign your name, and mail the card. That’s it.
I hope that you have a very happy holiday season this year.